Do you always worry if your boyfriend likes to watch blue movie which’s filled with adult content? Maybe you could calm down for little bit, because according to Ian Kerner, a sex therapist and author of ‘She Comes First’, the man and pornography is almost same with woman and salon. Woman usually feels fresh, relax, and forget about her stress when she comes out from the salon. Man also feels the same after he watches the blue movie.
Man’s sexuality is different from woman. Woman also likes to enjoy the sexy things, but the desire to make love doesn’t come right on that time. This is different with man’s case, man is easier to receive visual stimuli from outside, such as sexy pictures in magazines, sexy videos, or a sexy woman who passes in front of him. When man sees a sexy object, his nerves begin to ‘burn’, the blood rushed to the genital area, and he is ready to do the next session (eg masturbation). Masturbation is one of normal and healthy activity in sex life. The man who has a solid relationship and normal sex life tends to masturbate more often than man who doesn’t have such a background. Man with normal sex life tends to increase his testosterone level, while man who doesn’t have healthy sexual relationship tends to be more depressed, and that depression can omit his desire to make love.
A man who likes to watch blue movie is still interested to woman in a normal way, blue movie for him just like a snack that he wants to eat occasionally. But if man is not careful and not wise enough, this habit could also become drugs for him. In some cases, a man who feels losing something in his relation with a woman will use blue movie as a way for him to escape from the relationship, and if he ignores this problem, there’s possibility he will get addiction, affair, and even distortion.
If you find that your partner likes to see blue movie, what you need to do are:
1. Don’t argue with him.
It will only make him cornered, attacked, worried, panic, anxiety, and feel uncertain about his condition. You better do a constructive approach.
2. Don’t take it too serious.
Maybe you will start to wonder “What about our relationship in the future?”, or “So this is what makes him doesn’t want to get close with me anymore?”, or “How long will it happen?” Well … just take a deep breath, and then think carefully. Perhaps this habit won’t affect his attitude to you. Or if there’s a problem between you and him, maybe there are the other causes, not merely because of the blue movie.
So when can you start to worry about this habit?
Ask to yourself:
1. Does he lose his passion? Does he feel not interested in normal sexual activity? If the answer is yes, maybe he has spent his desire to the other sexual resources that normally can be done from the relationship with you.
2. Can he focus to you when he is making love with you? Some men may become so accustomed with the intense visual stimulation from blue movie, so without realize they start to get ADD (attention deficit disorder) in sexual life. As a result they are no longer able to focus on the sex activity with their partner.
3. Does he need more time to reach orgasm, or even he is often unable to get it? Some men don’t realize if too much consume blue movie can effect their ability to get orgasm with their partner.
If those questions don’t happen in the relationship between you and him, so there’s nothing you need to worry. But if you think that the questions often happen in your relationship, maybe it’s the time for him to consult with a doctor to get the best solution.
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