Self-Immolation: the sacrifice of Buddhist monk from Vietnam

March 11th, 2010 by turisuna No comments »

On June 11, 1963, a Buddhist monk named Thich Quang Duc, set fire to himself at a crowded intersection on the downtown of Saigon, Vietnam. The witnesses said that Thich Quang Duc along with several other monks came to the location by driving a car.

Thich Quang Duc got out from the car and then did lotus sitting position in the middle of that busy street, he poured gasoline all over his own body and set himself a light. The fire burned his body in a few seconds, but remarkably from the beginning when the fire burned Thich Quang Duc’s body, till the last moment he died, this monk didn’t move at all. He also didn’t make any sound when the fire burned his body.

The Peacefulness of Thich Quang Duc was contrary with the reaction and wailing of people who saw that incident directly from the location. The incident was captured by David Halberstam, a reporter of New York Times who was on the location when Thich Quang Duc doing Self-Immolation. David was in Vietnam to cover the war in that country, and his photograph became one of the world famous pictures.

Thich Quang Duc did the self-Immolation to show the protest toward Diem government, the monks asked for equal rights for the adherents of Buddhism. Previously the monks in Vietnam often protested the Diem government for the injustice that happened to some Buddhist followers. They were also demanding for the law enforcement toward some parties who responsible for the humanity crimes that happened in Vietnam. But unfortunately, their efforts never received positive response from the Diem government, until finally Thich Quang Duc did the self-immolation.

After the death of Thich Quang Duc, the Buddhist community tried to cremate his body, but amazingly his heart remained intact, then the heart was placed in the Reserve Bank of Vietnam and became the symbol of the Holy Heart.

Source: quangduc.com

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Six secrets of men

March 10th, 2010 by turisuna No comments »

1. The number of previous girlfriends
Indeed there’s man who exaggerate the number of his previous girlfriends, he wishes that you will impress on him and think if he is an adorable man. But if a man wants to build a serious relationship, he will cut the actual number of his ex-girlfriends, so you will regard him as a good and faithful man.
How to face it:
Just say ‘okay’, but of course you still need to be aware. If you find evidence that his ex-girlfriends more than the number he has mentioned, you don’t need to confront him, keep that information only for you. What matters now is how far his seriousness to build a relationship with you. If he doesn’t have any affair with another woman when he makes relationship with you, then you don’t need to worry about his loyalty, every person has a past.

2. He secretly compares you with his ex-girlfriend
Secretly man often compares woman with his ex-girlfriends, start from the appearance, the ability to get along with his friends, and even the ability on bed.
How to face it:
You don’t need to feel upset or try hard to change yourself. Just be yourself and feel comfortable with everything you already have, a woman who has strong personality will look sexier in man’s eyes. You may feel upset if he starts to throw comments or criticisms which comparing you with his ex-girlfriends.

3. He’s still in touch via online with his ex
Technological sophistication gives possibility for people to relate each other. The presence of social networks make someone could find some old friends, including ex-girlfriend. Sometimes man gets in touch with his old love as an effort to get ‘assurance’ that there will be someone who wants to accept him if the relationship with his girlfriend doesn’t run well.
How to face it:
You don’t need to panic or forbid him to join with the social networks. Don’t threaten him to close his facebook account if he has some female friends there. Some men use social networks to widen his connections; even they use it as marketing media. As long as he doesn’t hide his wall contents, or hiding someone from you, you don’t need to worry if he joins with the social networks.

4. He’s afraid if he can’t be faithful to you.
Everything will change, including you and him, sometimes man worried if the changes will affect his feeling to you. And the worse, this modern lifestyle tends to consider if the disloyal behavior is something normal.
How to face it:
You don’t need to worry, not all men have thin loyalty, there are men who full of commitment and loyal to his partner. Even a study in England said that men with high intelligence tend to be more faithful and monogamous. Dr. Kanazawa as a part of the study said that the more intelligent men tend to be monogamous and always uphold the sexual exclusivity value compared with the less intelligent men. Besides that, you can’t deny if the temptations are always around us, not only he who must be alert for the temptations, you should also keep your heart and avoid the temptation to have an affair.

5. Increase the frequency of sex
Many married men expect if they could get more sex in their marriage life. But some of them don’t say it frankly because they are afraid if their wife thinks that they are a sex maniac. As a result, many married men distribute their biological needs by masturbating.
How to face it:
If during this time the initiative to have sex always comes from your husband, occasionally you need to make changes, there’s no wrong if you make the initiative first. Widen your knowledge about sex also important, because the quality of sexual life is one of keys for the stability of marriage.

6. He is flirting with his female colleague
Some men admit if they ever flirt with female colleague at working place. Usually this happens because men spend more time at work than at home with their wife.
How to face it:
Flirting at working place usually is not something serious, because it’s very difficult to hide an affair among the colleagues. Don’t worry too much, be nice to his coworkers, because they can help you to watch your husband’s behavior in the office, even a good friend will try to remind your husband if he is tempted to have affair with other woman.

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No second chance

March 9th, 2010 by turisuna No comments »

Surely you wish if a first date can run smoothly, but unfortunately not all men could behave well in the first date, such as these following things:

1. Continuously talks about his ex girlfriend
For the first date he invites you for having a dinner, but only five minutes you are sitting at the restaurant, he starts to talk about his ex girlfriend. Such as “Do you know, this restaurant was our favorite place for dinner”, or maybe he tells about how he broke up from his ex or how he felt disappointed on her etc.
If he talks about his ex over and over again, and even he mentions her name for several times, it indicates that he hasn’t finished his problem with his ex, and he approaches you just to forget his hurt because of the previous relationship.

2. Calling, sending sms, playing with his Blackberry
You wish if the first date can be a good start of better communication with him, but in the middle of conversation, he always asks for time to answer the phone, reply the sms, or even open email from his blackberry.
If he is a doctor and the message is an emergency message from the hospital, maybe you can understand him, but if the message is coming from another woman, it’s a signal that he can’t appreciate your presence beside him.

3. Ask your name for many times
If he forgets your name once or twice, it’s still reasonable, maybe it’s because you didn’t say your name clearly. But if he asks your name over and over again, or even he calls you with the name of another woman, it’s not cool at all; he’s probably dating several women at the same time.

4. Staring at another woman
If he looks at another woman just for a few seconds, it’s still normal; woman sometimes also likes to look at other man who’s passing in front of her.
But if he looks at that woman from head to toe for long time without blinking and even he does that repeatedly, apparently this man has difficulty to be faithful to one woman.

5. Staring at other man
If you catch him looking at another man deeply, this is a bad sign for love relationships. If you just want to be his friend, this may not be a problem, but if you want to be a lover, you better trust your hunches, find another man who’s interested to the opposite sex.

6. He makes you pay the bill
In this modern era, it’s normal if a woman wants to pay the bill, but if he who invites you to go out, it means that he is the one who has responsible for the dating, including paying the dinner bill. This is not just about money, but this is responsibility issues.

7. He tries to kiss you with little bit forcing
After the unpleasant dating was over, he still tries to kiss you with little bit forcing. If you really don’t want it, don’t hesitate to leave him and close the door immediately.

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She’s Out of My League

March 8th, 2010 by turisuna No comments »

This movie tells about an airport security officer, Kirk Kettner (Baruchel), who has a very monotonous and boring life. He doesn’t have any ambition to be achieved and there’s no story could be proud of. Including his love story, his efforts to return to his former girlfriend, Marnie, gives impression that Kirk is not sure that he can find another woman who decent for him.

But everything changes drastically when a beautiful woman, Molly McCall (Eve), passes the inspection area where Kirk works. Then an incident brings Molly to Kirk, when Molly losing her iPhone, by coincidence the iPhone was found by Kirk, and as a thanking, Molly invites Kirk for a dinner.

From the brief meeting at the airport, now Kirk and Molly become lovers. An unbelievable thing that could happen to Kirk’s life, even no one of his friends and family who believe it, they think that Molly is too perfect for Kirk. Kirk’s friends try to convince him that he doesn’t deserve for Molly because she is too pretty for him, even they do some silly actions that could make Kirk look bad in front of Molly. And the worse, Kirk must deal with a handsome man who also tries to approach Molly.

Does Molly really love Kirk? And how far Kirk could survive from the various disturbances that could destroy his relationship with Molly?

If you want to find a light comedy movie to relieve stress, ‘She’s out of my league’ can be a good alternative movie for your spare time.

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Always give space to be hated

March 7th, 2010 by turisuna No comments »

Everyone wishes if the reality could be in line with the expectations; we always want to be happy, safe, and loved by everyone, there’s no hostility and hatred.

But unfortunately, hate and love will never be separated, if there are people who love us, certainly there are also people who hate us. Love and hate are born from many inevitable factors in life.

No one is perfect, everyone has flaws and weaknesses. If you see someone who looks perfect and has wonderful life, it may be because you don’t know him entirely. If you are given an opportunity to live and get close with him, certainly you will find some shortcomings that can’t be seen from outside.

And vice versa, if you hate someone and think that he has many shortcomings, maybe it’s because you haven’t known him further. Maybe he isn’t as bad as you think and even he has some specialties that you haven’t known yet.

The misunderstanding to evaluate others could be caused by many factors, and one of them is the mistake to understand someone’s background. In fact, someone’s background is an important factor to form his mindset, perspective, character, personality, and conviction.

The difference of background often makes people unable to accept each other. Different background can make a good intention defined as bad intention, and even the difference of background can cause the birth of hatred. If we are willing to understand it further, diversity actually is a beautiful thing, it’s like various flowers in garden that make the garden looks more beautiful.

Loved by many people is something fun, that’s why there’s one who tries hard to please everyone. But is it possible?
In real life pleasing everyone is something impossible to do, no matter how hard you try, there must be someone who feels unsatisfied with what you have done.

There’s a story about a father who wants to teach his son if human satisfaction is an endless fulfillment, he can’t make everyone love him even though he has tried hard to please them.

To prove it, the father takes his son to go out by bringing a donkey with them.

At first, the father rides the donkey and lets his son following him from behind. When they pass a group of people, those people start to talk about them and say, “Look that old man, he is a cruel father and doesn’t have heart, he lets his son exhausted while he’s riding the donkey”.

Then the father goes down and asks his son to ride the donkey, when they pass another group of people, those people start to look at them and say “See that kid, I’m sure if his father never teaches him how to behave, that boy lets his father exhausted while he’s riding the donkey”.

Then both of them ride the donkey, when they pass another group of people, those people also say bad things about that father and son. “See that father and son, they are very cruel, they torture the donkey. They ride that little donkey while their bodies are big”.

Then the father and son get down from the donkey and walk behind it, when they pass a group of people, those people say, “Look that father and son, they are very stupid, they have a donkey but they don’t ride it”.

Finally that father and son agree to tie up the donkey and carrying it above their heads, the people who see them laugh loudly and think if they are crazy father and son.

Life is hard, we can’t control how people should think about us, instead of struggling to please everyone or spend much energy to counter the hatred, we better always give a space to be hated and take it out together with our breath, because in this world no one is perfect.

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